A Form of Escape

Sometimes I wonder if I am using religion as a means to escape the realities of my situation that I am in. Do I need more pressure? I feel like this time I'm supposed to focus on you God and I've only have felt peace when I do. But I guess am I running to you like a drug to maybe take the pain I would feel if you weren't there? I don't know but let me keep looking towards you because I know you will provide and take care of me. Even if that involves periods of stillness and harshness.